The Navy released a report regarding its latest Sea Wolf attack submarine, the USS Jimmy Carter. What was expected to be a big player in the War on Terror is very disappointing, said a spokesperson for the Navy.
Initial tests revealed the USS Jimmy Carter would only turn radically to the left. As a part of the ship's affirmative action policy, the staff of more than 400 was made up of men and women from 210 countries speaking 144 different languages, making communication virtually impossible.
Although the USS Jimmy Carter's top speed remains classified, engineers say it is fast enough to clear the Panama Canal in less than 20 minutes, if he hadn't given it away!
The USS Jimmy Carter will not be a total waste, however. Officials unveiled plans to make a museum out of it. It will rest peacefully on a nut farm in Plains, Ga., where patrons can visit Jimmy, bad mouth Uncle Sam and get loaded on peanuts and Billy Beer, all for just $19.95!
Thats pretty good. Good way to start the morning. :lol:
Can you believe that guy was our president at one time? What a loser.